BLOG: When to be selfish

Natalie tells us what the key to inner happiness is…


Are you someone that always wants to make others happy? Are you too laid back for your own good?

To be selfless is always talked about as a hugely positive attribute. However, there are times when this can be detrimental to our own happiness. To put others before ourselves constantly leaves no room to fulfil personal dreams and ambitions. Sometimes we just have to say “it’s my time”. But I struggle with this myself, and so am fully aware this is easier said than done!

Yes, it’s nice to think of other people. We can consider them, just not all the time.

You can rarely keep everyone happy. Often this only leads to everyone being unhappy, especially you. You have failed to work out an arrangement that is good for everyone, so not only did you sacrifice your wants, but this will feel like it was for nothing. No one wins. Where do you draw the line?

A solution seems hard to find. There are no easy ways of removing this dilemma from our lives. As much as you might want to avoid it, sometimes to get the things you really want you will need to tread on a few toes. It is about realising what matters most in your own life, and finding a way of reaching these personal goals whilst remaining somewhat selfless and compromising in other areas that don’t matter as much to you. Some decisions we must make by ourselves, for ourselves.

Selflessness is positive, but so is striking the right balance. We should always think of others. The key is to be aware of when this starts to infringe on our personal goals, and more importantly happiness. This is where the line between selfish and selfless must be drawn.

And there you have it, the secret to a happy, guilt- free life…. If only it were that simple!